First, sorry for all the posts about me...we haven't been done anything exciting recently.
So they say that transition is the most difficult part of labor. I think transition is generally the most difficult part of life (I'm not so good at change). Since I had an epidural, transition in labor was not even a smidgen as difficult as transition to being a mommy. Don't get me wrong I love being a mommy, but I've had my moments.
Maybe it is because my brain has shriveled up and died?
(The other day at the pediatrician's office I could not think of any appropriate words to use to answer the doc's questions. I was saying things like "they took her away in the thingy to do that stuff to her" or "she had an IV with what-do-you-call-it in it because they thought she had the word that starts with a c". I kid you not, that was what my conversational skills were like that day. I'll bet she'd never in a million years guess that I am a college graduate the way I wowed her with my verbal prowess.) (Another tangent that makes me feel better: According to this article a pregnant woman's brain appears to shrink during pregnancy and can take up to 6 months to regain it's pre-prego size (like the rest of me...). True or not? Let me believe so I can feel better about myself. Thankyou. :) )Maybe it is because I can't always calm Grace as quickly as I'd like?
Maybe it is because I don't get much human interaction (scratch that...adult interaction - I have plenty of human interaction)?
Maybe it is because I used to go to school and/or work all day, every day and now I do nothing (it seems)?
Maybe it is because there are so many crazy hormones shooting through my body it has no idea what to do?
I've decided I like to work with my hands. I can get things done and admire what a good (or not so much) job I did. But I can immediately see the results nevertheless. Mommying is not like that. (Thought: maybe this is God teaching me patience? I've never been much good at that.) You put forth all of your last bits of love and effort and you still have an adorable red-faced creature squawking at you for who knows what reason? Sometimes it's hard to see a light at the end of the tunnel. Now, Rob is fantastic at letting me know how much he appreciates me, but sometimes I feel like a blob. Sure I clean, I blog, I make dinner (most of the time), I shower, and most of the time I feel good about what I can accomplish. But every once in a while I feel like a failure. Take yesterday for example. I forgot that we had an event to attend at 6 pm and so I didn't start dinner early enough to be able to eat it before we left. I felt totally silly that I had spent the day reading blogs when I could have taken 30 minutes to think about dinner. I felt like a failure. Now, I know (now) that I wasn't failing at wifeing and mommying, but I felt like it. I cried and felt sorry for myself and poor Rob didn't know what to say to make me feel better. Now, don't go calling my midwife up and telling her that I've got post-partum depression. I don't. I was only a 6 (? I don't know out of how much) according to the quiz (? because that's a good way to tell?) I took at my last appointment which I was told is apparently not anything to worry about. Anyway, for recovery usually all I ever need is some food in my belly and a good sleep and I feel much better. I fully attribute my "craziness" to a nasty combination of hormones, tiredness and soaring expectations of myself. Roger Anderson said it perfectly when he said that "you just have to accept that some days you're the pigeon and some days you're the statue."
I don't write this because I want sympathy. Usually life is peachy, but
sometimes... I just think that I am not alone and it's refreshing to hear others' experiences so you don't think that you alone are crazy. Plus it's therapeutic and kind of fun to write it out. :)
Really, how can I not love mommying when I have this beautiful baby smiling at me (
most of the day)?
By the way, it took 40-gagillion terrible pictures to get this
one cute one. Happy 2 month birthday Grace!
p.s. The top photo makes me look like I weigh a thousand pounds, but I promise I have been losing the baby weight and haven't been eating as much as this post makes it sound like :)
About this time we ran out of batteries on the camera and we wanted to save them for one last picture of the best part of the night. So we didn't get a picture of the pigs. Seeing the Big Pig is my favorite part of the fair. And the Big Pig at this year's state fair didn't disappoint. He was gigantic! His back alone was probably as long as I am tall. Rob guessed that he weighed more than a ton! We also got to see the baby piglets, they were so cute and Grace could relate. I think they taught her some of the noises that she makes in her sleep (for those of you who don't know, Gracie is kind of a noisy sleeper, she grunts a lot while she's asleep!). :)
Gracie doesn't look too happy to be here at the rodeo, but don't let the picture fool you, it was the highlight of her day! We had a great time watching the cowboys get bucked. It was pretty entertaining because to start the night off, a bronc bucked himself right over with the cowboy still riding him! It was kind of scary to see the bronc on his side with the cowboy pinned underneath him. Then later, a bull bucked so hard, he bucked himself right over onto his side as well! Luckily that cowboy had already fallen off! I had never seen that before, and to see two animals do it was pretty exciting.
Gracie got a true cougar blue onesie to wear during the games to cheer her favorite team on!
Rob barbecued some delicious burgers for us to enjoy as we beat Northern Iowa University.
Well, Grace has the first stamp in her passport. Rob, Grace and I spent a week in Cozumel, Mexico thanks to Wayne Leary, Rob's old Scout leader who took four of his scouts and their wives on a dive trip to Cozumel. The friends that came on the trip were Wayne Leary, John and Patricia Leary, Preston and Melissa Anderson, Tom and Crystine Carter and Rob, Gracie and me.
The pool area of our hotel, Hotel Cozumel. The pool was really nice. It was huge - there are lots of little areas of the pool that you can swim in that makes it feel like there aren't a ton of other people swimming with you. The day this picture was taken I think I was the only one in the pool.
y night as a fun night out for everyone (not to mention it sounded incredibly tasty). Tom and Crystine had been on a pirate cruise when they went to Mexico and they said that theirs was fun and romantic. We were all really excited to go! Well, let's just say that it was an all-you-can-drink (and let's see how drunk we can get you) cruise and it was less than romantic. Pretty much they played drinking games and were naughty the whole time. I guess we should have known we were in for an adventure when we saw the disco ball hanging on the deck. Anyway, adventure it was. All of the pirates kissed Gracie at least once. The Pirate Barracuda (on left in the photo) stole Crystine's earring, then lost it, but the Pirate Porkchop (in the middle) found it. Preston Anderson was caught off guard and got Tequila squeezed into his mouth. 
We did experience an amazing sunset on the cruise.
